What does the Artic Attack have in common with your mother-in-law, Ann? A lot, actually. Remember way back in December when she blew into town for a White Christmas? That first blush of winter, when it was actually fun to have her there for the kids to play with? Cut to more than a month later. She’s STILL here, wearing out her welcome hourly, causing nothing but dramas and delays. Even the kids are sick of her 24/7 hovering and are begging you for some relief.
What to do? Escape to a more hospitable climate. But not just, “somewhere warm” like everyone else. We say, go bold or go home, because you’re going to jump off a glacier if you have to spend five more minutes with Ann Arctica. So here are a few suggestions for exotic, exclusive getaways tailored JUST for you by Time & Place :
St. Barts: Weather? OMGorgeous! What to wear? For the daytime: a skim coat of suntan lotion, that sexy little anklet maybe, board shorts with a dry-pocket for your credit card and dark Gucci shades. At night: glitter lotion on your bare brown shoulders, a Vera Wang strapless gown AND a grin. Instead of Yahtzee at the kitchen table all February long, how about a yatch? St. Barts has many. You can take the little guys to Shell Beach, where they can surf kid-sized waves all day. At night, you can head to the Flamands area for French-infused local fare, with an emphasis on seafood. OR go nowhere once you’re here. Float in one of our properties’ awesome infinity pools watching the tide come in, then go out, thinking of all the unfortunates back home de-icing the door locks on their Volvo SUVs. Have another rum-infused cocktail – it’s only 3pm.
Buenos Aires: Beach not your thing? Jet to Buenos Aires for an amazing urban experience. Oh, it’s still warm, and so is the steak –and the tango. The tango? That’s actually sizzling hot! During the day, tuck a local hibiscus behind your ear and shop the sixteen blocks of San Telmo for antiques and handicrafts. Rest at this corner bar, then that corner café. Pop into eclectic boutiques for avant-garde fashion at the Palermo Viejo and pick up something for your tango lessons, or just for sitting over a glass of excellent Argentine wine. A fan of horses? Our concierge can book polo lessons, or you can take a trip to a ranch where gauchos still work cattle like the Wild West. Take the kids to the award-winning Museo de los Niños where “art” and “hands-on” meet. And later get some tickets to the Fuerza Bruta , a combo circus, concert, and crowd-participation show; like Cirque du Soleil meets Blue Man Group meets Springsteen. For the nature lover, there’s bird watching, picnics on a subtropical river delta, or moonlight tours of the jungle. Buenos Aires cooks!
Canouan: It’s the answer to, “crowds” – as in, there aren’t any. Never heard of it? Exactly. This is the insider’s treat of retreats. One of the necklaces of 160 islands that make up the Grenadines and Antilles, Canouan is five square miles of private, pristine paradise. Well, it does have world-class golf (a course designed by Jim Fazio), world-class restaurants, and universe-class beaches. You can sail coves featured in Pirates of the Caribbean. Snorkel with those turtles from Finding Nemo, since they hang out in Canouan’s miles of coral reef just off the sugar-sand beaches in the jewel-green Caribbean. At night, slip on a pair of Havaianas flip-flops and head over to Tamarind Beach for the music scene. The rum-punch never runs dry there, or anywhere else on the island.
Phuket: It’s a city built on the Adaman Sea with one of the most beautiful landscapes in the world. Warm all the time, when it isn’t just downright steamy. You could, if you wanted, just take your Kindle down to the soft-sand beach, pretend to read, and soak up the sun you haven’t seen at home since September. Or maybe you’d like our concierge to hook you up with a spin on an elephant, or go visit the Big Buddha and pat its 147-foot-high belly for a whole lot of excellent luck. After that, treat yourself to a few yards of beautiful, heavy Thai silk in the markets of Old Phuket Town. Or indulge in an exquisite gem or six, since Phuket is a center from gemstones in that part of the world. And at night? Seafood. So much seafood! Catch some of your own and have a personal chef come to your house and cook up a Ho Muk Talay, Thai-hot, if you want!
Punta Mita: Who knew there was such an exclusive warm weather destination right next store? This select nook of Mexico is chock-full of designer shops and art galleries, with a kicking-hot nightlife—think clubs, bars, cabarets and casinos. In Punta Mita all you need is your private sailboat, your surfboard, your fishing rod and your personal fishing guide. Mahi mahi is on the menu and YOU caught it! Kids? Explore the beaches of Sayulita and San Pancho, with their quiet surf and little ones toting sand in pails. Or take them paddle-boarding out on the reefs among the exotic tropical fish right there in Punta Mita. This time of year, hire a boat to watch the humpback whales breach for real – not just in a Superbowl commercial. Some boats offer special microphones so you can hear them singing, just like Dora does. Or perhaps you’d rather work your handicap while baking the polar vortex right out of your bones on one of the two Jack Nicklaus-designed golf courses. Dinner might just be anything: the fish you brought home, prepared by a professional chef engaged by your personal concierge.
The snowy sidewalks and your puffy coat (but hopefully not Ann) will be waiting there when you get home. If you ever go home.
Time & Place offers the world’s finest private-stay homes supported by exclusive concierge services and activities. Travel+Leisure magazine recently recognized Time & Place as one of the top 5 villa rental agencies in the world.
